Happy Holidays to all my beloved friends and family!

I did not want to write my newsletter this year. For the last 20 years I have written an online photo essay about the memorable events in our lives that year and sent the URL at Christmas-time. By the way, this views best on a wide screen.

I wrote those yearly letters to celebrate the joy we had experienced. I wrote them to stay in touch with friends and family back East. I wrote them because I thought one day Steve might suffer from Alzheimer's like his father before him and they might help his memory.

To my surprise, it was my memories that they helped after an accident in 2010! (click here) 

A Year of Loss

My wonderful husband Steve died on March 30 after a long battle with prostate cancer. Our beautiful dog Kyndra may have lost her will to live once he was gone. She developed cancer, hemangiosarcoma, not long after Steve passed away and died in October.

Steve's funeral service was on a glorious sunny day, outdoors by his grave site on April 2, zoomed to friends and family. Our friend Wirt even captured some of it on his drone! About 25 of our closest friends came in person, including my brother Shipley, who stayed to help me for a week. Our good friend Lynne Feldman had a lovely reception on her outdoor terrace afterwards. Thank you Lynne!

My Friends Pitch In and DNA

So many friends inviting me out to do things. Thank you! The local winery Trevi Hills with the Neumeisters and others. Fishing with Judy. Dinner with my DNA Adoption buddies and of course much online Bridge with Lynne plus the occasional D.Z.Akins dinner.

Somehow I became Garden Club president and also managed to submit presentations that were due. Plus deal with much paper work and start the decluttering process.

Meanwhile in a startling development a DNA match for Steve came in that helped me solve the mystery of his unknown second cousin the sperm donor - click here for that story. Thank you David Wolfson (Doug in the story) for your family tree work which solved it.

Staying Busy

The advice was to keep busy so I got in the camper van and went. I had traded in our big RV for something I could drive so that perhaps I could drive him back to M.D.Anderson in Texas. That was not to be but visiting friends and family in it seemed a good choice.

First a test trip to the beach, then off to Tucson, Arizona to see widow friend Barbara and close friends Adrienne and Bill.

Sadly the van got hit on the rear passenger side in what seemed a minor accident but caused major damage. It was apparently my fault! So Kyndra and I stayed a few healing weeks with Bill and Adrienne before giving up and renting a car to go home. Supply chain issues made it difficult for the repair place to get the needed parts so the initial time estimate was way off.

Visitors

My wonderful half 4th cousin Corinne who I travelled to Norway with in 2015 (click here) came down for a day of comforting. As someone who had gone through being widowed, she was my first go to to call during the occasional melt down.

In July, when it looked like COVID might be ending, my son Paul came for a visit with my grandson Jack. We went to Legoland, his favorite thing to do here, and met up with his cousin Finn and maternal uncle K.C. for a wonderful day there.

All 50 states!

More Travels

The weather was much hotter on my return to Tucson in August to get my van so I did not stay long.

I visited friends in Flagstaff, and the Best Friends Sanctuary in Moab on the way to see my brother in Salt Lake City. The visit with family was very healing. I was delighted when my sister-in-law invited me back for Thanksgiving On the way home, I stopped to see genealogy friend Anne House and catch a show at the outdoor red rock ampitheater in St. George, UT.

Kyndra loved the beach, as do I. So back home we camped at the San Elijo beach midweek most every week. It was also quite near her oncologist in Carlsbad. These trips often included lunches or dinners with North County bridge friends like the Gailfuses, Golds, and Malkins.

Another fun local event was the blooming of the corpse plant at the San Diego Botanic Gardens which I took in with friend Carol Gold, wife of bridge player Rick.

Rockie, my new puppy

Rochelle, a college buddy of Steve's and now my friend, who lives near my brother, texted me a mere two days after Kyndra's death, that they had found a puppy by the side of the road near Shiprock, NM. I texted back that no I did not want a puppy!

However in my dreams that night Steve convinced me to take her, so I agreed to pick her up at Thanksgiving. I am sure none of my friends are surprised that I did her DNA. she is 28% heeler, 18% Great White Pyrenees, 9% Lab, plus many others.

The stay with my brother was wonderful, although a bit cold for me. It included a family Thanksgiving at his mother-in-laws who happily took an ancestry DNA test! None of Shipley's family had ever seen him lose at Categories before! He won the first game, I won the second, and had a higher total.

Rockie was well-behaved on the slow trip home. Stopped with Anne House again and watched the dogs play.

We took all the byways leaving the highway once we were in California: stayed in the Valley of Fire, drove through the Mohave desert, the Joshua Tree National Park, and then visited Corinne in Palm Springs. Wonderful to see her and Ed's home. Finally took the back way over the mountains to go home.

Back home it was time to prepare for Christmas, presents were sent, lights ordered but never put up ...

Enjoyed the San Diego version of the Scrooge story at the theater in the round at the Olde Globe in Balboa Park with friends the Golds and Janice. Christmas Day was an Open House at Lynne's; a quiet afternoon with many good friends dropping by.

This letter has gotten way too long and I have left out many things like camping with the Compadres. I managed to stay very busy and even joined a weekly zoomed grief group. I still have much decluttering to do and a puppy to train! I have New Year's reservations at one of our favorite campgrounds in Malibu.

Here's wishing for a far better year next year, for us all!